Sugar Mommy: Encouragement for Expectant Mothers with Type 1 Diabetes

Heading into the second trimester of my first pregnancy, a friend asked me how I was feeling. She asked me this every time we talked but this time she said “I remember when I was pregnant that I felt sort of alone, like no one could possibly understand what my body was going through.“ I knew exactly what she meant and on more than one level. I have always felt that way about living with Type 1 Diabetes – alone, like no one else in the world could possibly understand the physical and emotional anguishes that often accompany this disease. Couple that with some of the hardships of pregnancy and I found myself in a very lonely, private place. I was not worried about how the disease would affect me while I was pregnant – your body already goes through so much while pregnant, what was one more thing? I was worried about my unborn child.

This is not to say that I did not have tremendous loving support in my life at the time. My husband, Aaron, my friends and family were there to listen, learn about my plight and offer whatever caring words they could muster up. Aaron spent many more hours on the internet searching out information than I did. More than once, he came into our bedroom late at night with great concern having found some extreme cases that often pop up in cyberspace. My team of specialists – my “high risk” obstetrician, endocrinologist, diabetic nurse – was as supportive and knowledgeable as one could wish for. Actually, I was thrilled to be pregnant and already in love with my unborn child.

As many first-time expectant mothers do, I read all of the popular books on pregnancy, some more light hearted, some more technical. As the famed author C.S. Lewis once said, “We read to know we are not alone.” So, after reading my books on pregnancy, I searched the internet for any kind of support forums or information dedicated to pregnancy and Type 1 Diabetes. I found plenty of information focused on Gestational Diabetes. However, this is a very different condition – one that I would have gladly undertaken in place of what I was facing. I needed to read accounts of pregnant women with Type 1 Diabetes, or better yet, success stories of healthy babies born to these moms. I became frustrated at books and websites that wrap all types of diabetes into one. Although the symptoms are similar, the conditions and living experiences of the different types are very dissimilar. And, material about Type 1 Diabetes, or Juvenile Diabetes, seemed to focus too much on the “juvenile” aspect of the disease. I found myself saying directly to the computer screen “hey, we juveniles grow up and some of want to become mothers!” If I found any information, it was a link to warnings about getting pregnant with Type 1 Diabetes, including possible developmental defects of the fetus.

Was I really the only woman going through this? Or, was I the only one feeling scared and alone? Were all other expectant mothers with Type 1 Diabetes totally confident that their unborn children would be perfectly unharmed by the disease? Of course not. I could not be the only woman dealing with Type 1 Diabetes and petrified that my unborn child would be harmed because of my condition. I desperately yearned for some support and empathy. Living with Type 1 Diabetes and now pregnancy with an unborn life relying on my “good behavior” was a very scary responsibility.

My next step was to talk with my diabetic nurse, who I had gotten to know very well since I had been checking in with her with her once a week to chart my “numbers”. I asked her if she was working with other women like me and she said she had three other patients at various stages of pregnancy. I asked her if she thought they might be interested in forming a support group. She excitedly answered that she thought they would. But due to confidentiality laws, she would have to arrange it. I was so eager to meet these women! Well, everybody’s schedules were so busy and it was very difficult to arrange a meeting. And, as pregnancy goes, time and gestation waits for no one!

I was back to square one and by this time about 28 weeks pregnant. I knew I had to take matters into my own hands and at least document my own story so that maybe the next woman with Type 1 Diabetes who wants to become a mother or is already pregnant would not feel so alone. Here is what I have to say to you women: You are not alone, you can get through this and you can have a healthy baby.

I am not a doctor and am not going to attempt to give out medical advice. Every person with diabetes is different and every pregnancy is different. However, I can offer some encouragement and even some tips on how to get through it. Let’s face it, pregnancy is hard enough when you are a “normal” woman. Diabetes adds an extra layer of caution and attentiveness for nine months. If other people are blessed with a pancreas that operates on “autopilot” those of us with type 1 diabetes have to “manually steer” ours. When pregnant, the journey includes many hills, valleys and countless curves along the way. Yet, the challenges of pregnancy with Type 1 Diabetes are more than worth the prize at the end.  To be continued.

Post Script
Share your stories with me. As I continue to say, every pregnancy and every person with diabetes is different. These were my experiences but you will have your own unique experiences. Please write to me and let me know your own story. I would love to hear from you. Also, if you have Type 1 Diabetes and are hoping to become a mother, please contact me. My goal is to reach out other expectant mothers with Type 1 Diabetes. My wish is that the next woman who feels as frightened and alone as I did may be comforted by our stories.

This is the first entry in a series of four posts by Shelly Jensen.

Tagged as: encouragement, living with type 1 diabetes, pregnant, support